Develop and enhance your natural gifts: care, compassion, solidarity
Work on your main problem area: giving your value away to others
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speak directly about your needs;
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keep a list of things you need to do for yourself, and stick with it;
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catch yourself flattering others for approval;
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catch yourself feeling the need to get more intimate with someone;
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learn to pay attention to your body; watch for burn-out, which leads to resentment;
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practice saying no;
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avoid falling in love with “fixer-uppers”; (“if only I love him/her enough, s/he will turn around…”);
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resist the urge to rescue;
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perform anonymous acts of service;
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when answering an urge to help someone, ask them first what they need, and what they don’t need, from you;
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when answering an urge to help someone, ask yourself what you need at this time;
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accept you are neither the best nor the worst but somewhere in the middle;
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use resentment and anger to identify your needs;
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note whose love you are looking for;
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reflect on how you would know you are loved;
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develop self-care.
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Spiritual practices:
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Follow Jesus as healer
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TWOs need to stand on their relationship with God recognizing their neediness as opposed to “I don’t need anything”. In Gospel contemplation, look at Luke 14:12-15: the poor are invited to the feast, yet they have not done anything to prompt others to love them back.
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Gospel contemplation: be with Martha, as she gets everything ready
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imagine yourself sitting with Jesus in a safe place, and Jesus saying “I really love you” to you
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Gospel contemplation with Jesus and the blind man, as Jesus says to him “What do you need?”
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In the safety of your relationship with God, share with God what your real needs are
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do an Awareness Examen every evening to identify where you have felt loved by God and by others
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watch out for warning signs that you are too stressed as a TWO:
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you have extreme tendencies to deceive yourself
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you act with a sense of delusional entitlement
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you find yourself manipulating or coercing others
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you experience episodes of obsessive love out of keeping with your age and status
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you find evidence in yourself of repressed aggression
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